S/tick is pleased to present our first contributor for Issue 2.1, “Managing,” Louie Clay (né Louie Crew)! The issue will be launched in March and is still seeking submissions. Please don’t hesitate to submit, and please check out Louie’s Youtube channel. Be sure to listen to the editors’ particular favourite, “To Tell the Truth.”
When I Jog
When I jog (i.e., ‘do an aerobic waddle’)
my neighbors never shout, “Writer!”
though some of the shouters know I publish.
They never shout “Christian!”
though some know that I try
to accept the challenges of that “lifestyle.”
Nor do they ever shout “Professor!”
though they know that I have taught
for the last 32 years.
No, those who shout always shout
"Faggot!" as if they had just discovered it,
when I long ago told everybody.
I suppose I must be patient
with their intellectual deficiencies.
I had to remind my husband of that
when he called from Hong Kong yesterday,
quite frustrated. In a nightmare,
he had died and had come back as a heterosexual
living in the suburbs with two and one-half children
who loved him only for his money,
a wife who didn’t love him at all, and
a girlfriend who was suing him for child support.
"When I awoke," my husband said,
"I got down on my knees and prayed to Buddha,
'pluuulease! if you ever reincarnate me,
let me be a fly, let me be a roach,
let me be the lowliest creature in your universe
if need be, but whatever you do,
don’t reincarnate me as a heterosexual!’ ”
Sure, he’ll lead. Trust me.
All he needs is a gentle nudge, a kiss.
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